“Insecurity sur…


“Insecurity surrounded me, at that moment I realized I was in love. Everything threatened love. I was scared, I was jealous. I was panicked, I felt betrayed and abandoned and lied to. I thought myself a fool for thinking you could love me back or that we could love each other freely. I doubted everything there had ever been between us, everything you said and even everything I had ever felt. I didn’t believe in the future, or the present, it got to the point where I didn’t believe the past. ”


One of the rules, if you’re fat, you can’t question thin people’s eating habits, ever.

You can be fat, you can be overweight, you can even be grotesquely obese, BUT it means you forfeit the God-given right you thought you had to question how and what thin people eat*.  Sorry, but it’s one of the rules.  I know with all the weight discrimination talk out there and 20/20 doing their pieces on how  poorly society treats overweight people, we’re scared to bring this rule back to light, and I am not saying thin people have the right humiliate the overweight, but thin people do have the right not to have to listen to nutritional advice from the overweight.  We, yes I am on the thin side, have earned the right not to be criticized by the overweight community.  Don’t you worry, I’ll explain.  When doughnuts are bought into work and I almost get knocked over because someone noticed there was only one jelly-filled left and I forgo my doughnut thus allowing someone a second helping.  Do I get even a “thank you”?  Nope, instead I am told “to live a little”.  I am told I am “too picky” by someone who weighs at least 100 lbs more than I do.  That is just not okay.  My friend’s wife, who is my height and weighs 40 lbs more than I do, who has gone to the gym less times in her life than I have in a week, questioned if my meal was “healthy”.   This is against the rules people.  Why is it acceptable for someone to tell me to “put some meat one my bones”, yet I cannot tell someone to get rid of some fat from theirs?  I can be called all kinds of names, the work place is notorious for this, but if I called one person “fat”, even if it was the fattest person there or even used the word “overweight”, I would be in HR so quick, quicker than everyone running that time the boss made those yummy brownies with the Herseys Kiss on top and some caramel drizzle, well everyone said they were yummy.   I work hard to look how I do and I certainly will not criticize the way anyone else looks, but come on, common courtesy, that’s all.


*As in most cases, there are always exceptions; you are in the medical or mental health profession or are a formally thin person, but have suffered some tragic injury or serious accident, perhaps defending our country or rescuing a child from a fire, that sort of thing or have a health condition that substantially effects your metabolism.

Open Letter To Creepy Dad

Dear Creepy Dad,
I must admit I am a bit taken back by your actions tonight or lack there of. As we embark on the 6th year of our “relationship”, I fear you have lost interest. I did not know I would handle this so hard, or even hard at all, but there was something missing from tonight’s Open House. You did not look at me once. Perhaps you did not see me? I know I sat in back and stayed to myself and didn’t talk to anyone, I tend to be little on the shy side and I don’t think I have too much in common with the other parents, but that’s a whole other set of issues, back to you and me, sir, this is not over. I just find it difficult to believe you did not notice me. I can’t believe that after everything we had together you would just throw it all away. Like that conversation we had 2 years ago on Halloween, well our only conversation. I must admit that for an older gentleman you are quite agile and stealthy, reminding me of perhaps a ninja, you really did come out of nowhere and you’re quick, when I saw you in front of me I tried to ignore you and walk away, almost running at one point, but you were not having that, you must be a Type A personality. You did not care my children were there or my friend and her children. Your eyesight is that of cat, for that as well I commend you, it was dark, I was dressed like a butterfly, but you still spotted me, which brings me back to original point about tonight. Did you see me or not? I know your wife saw me in the hallway, she gave me the eye, after the Halloween incident she keeps a close eye on me. So what the hell? Are you trying to turn the tables here? I know at times I seemed a little put off by you, annoyed, or even frightened. Maybe I just misunderstood your determination as inappropriate behavior, I know my ex-husband did, when he blocked you from continuing to take pictures of me at the Holiday Performance. Until he pointed it out, I did not notice you due to the fact I was too busy watching the kids sing, “All I want for Christmas are my 2 front teeth”. I should apologize for him temporarily blocking your shots, you might have noticed we go into a bit of an argument . You see he was in my personal space and I’m kind of weird about that, especially with him, since we are divorced and all, I did not feel he had the right to get so close to me, he was acting kind of jealous, he said protective, but I wasn’t buying it. Anyways, I weighed my options and if it makes you feel any better, you won. I decided I would rather you, Creepy Dad take pictures of me and do whatever it is you were planning on doing with them, than have my ex inhaling the air I had just exhaled, I think that’s carbon monoxide, not sure though, but I think I read that somewhere. Oh maybe I should apologize for calling you, “Creepy Dad”. I apologize for calling you “Creepy Dad” and I apologize on behalf of my ex and my friend from Halloween, they call you that, too, but I don’t know your name. So now what? Can we fix this, have we just run our course, are you playing hard to get? Help me out here Creepy Dad, can’t you see I’m trying!!!???